My princess has changed me!

My baby girl is growing up! She just became 10 months, reached the height of my dining table, is walking holding furniture for support, laughing at things she find humourous, has her own special way of doing things and understands a whole lot of things!!!
Feels like she was born just the other day. I was introduced into the world of motherhood and suddenly it all changes. Now it looks like I've been a mother all my life! My baby, you have changed me! My classmate from college looked surprised when she saw the contents of the bag I carry nowadays... full of baby stuff! ...and baby stuff alone! At college, I had my bag full of personal goodies... and everybody knew where to go if they needed something. Now, my things has taken the rear-most seat. No more of time alone, long phone calls or beauty parlour sessions. It's baby time all the time. But, I should admit that I'm loving this. Her smile, her touch, her look into my eyes, is all that's needed to ignite that special magic! She brings a smile to me when I think I cannot go further. She loves me unconditionally, making me want to love & appreciate others more & more. Everyday has a better meaning now & everyday has a cuter smile. And yes, everytime she looks at me & smiles, a tear comes to my eye & I know we will share this special bond forever! I love the way she loves me!
She has changed my world & I'm loving it! Just loving it with her!

I wonder when again!

It was all so misty & cool and I could see nothing else but the pure white & thick air. The mist moved away so gently... to let me see the crispy green grass that covered the ground so neatly. My feet touched it and I melted in that feel of the soft grass with dew drops... on my feet. A cold breeze blew, my long black hair swirling in it... it felt like the breeze held my face in its firm hands. My soft white linen dress with big faded-pink flowers swayed and I lifted my hands a little to touch the gentle breeze which now surrounded me as if leading me to somewhere. As I stood there enchanted by the moment, the wind caressing me, I could hear the soothing sound of flowing water. The mist cleared up a little more to show the crystal clear brook nearby and I started walking towards it... drinking in this moment with every step I took. Nothing like this! No grass has ever been softer, no breeze so gentle and no sound so soothing!
I sat near the brook and touched the water, and it felt like I was fully immersed in it. I took a deep breath and the air smelled like sweet fragrance. Turning my face around I could see the mist moving away and into my vision came the beautiful plants with bright pink flowers and some tall trees behind them. I ran towards it my hair now being combed by the cold breeze. The bright pink flowers with smooth creamy petals smelled heavenly. I plucked one and put it on my hair and slowly dropped myself onto the bed of grass, closed my eyes and took in moment by moment this experience beyond words... no cares or worries, no thoughts or troubles! Pure bliss!
A little later my eyes felt the rays of the sun and I wondered how? This place is too enchanting to feel the sun so strong... and very lazily I opened my eyes to realise all this was but a dream!!!
Never was a dream so true, so enjoyable, so enchanting... Will this dream come true I wonder! I will hold on to this until I get it and I can wait for it with all my heart! sigh! :)

The li'l princess is now in pain...

It's been some days since my li'l princess has been sick with diarrhea, cold & cough. But she's been braving it all with her ever so smiling attitude. She smiles showing her two tiny teeth, laughs and plays with her dad & mom and now when she cries, we know its beyond what she can bear.
Last night she cried endlessly without sleeping & I was shocked to see the diaper rash become so red and bad! We gave her a sitz bath in lukewarm water & salt. Then we let her lie without a diaper & she slept well. The continuous diarrhea might have caused this and we cannot do much in easing her pain. We were applying ointments & creams.
Today is Good Friday and her doc is out of town. Her homeopathic doc told us to apply coconut oil and leave her diaper free. It will be a havoc with her diarrhea but anything to help her!
It is heart-breaking to see my Prathyasha (hope) in pain. I need more energy, peace of mind and patience to help her out. Wish there was someone to help us with at-least the cooking & cleaning part.
More than anything, I pray to The Almighty Father to heal her completely & give her back her smile & energy.
There she sleeps now beside me like a tired li'l princess. Muahhh!!

There's a beautiful angel beside me now!

I didn't have to wait long after I lost my first baby... I thought I'll never have another baby as I didn't want to go through the pain I already did. But after about four months, the second miracle took form in me.
It was a difficult path. We were at first scared to be excited. Then we slowly took it in and the first time we heard the heart beat, we felt the excitement rise up in us! Every month was such a sweet delight. I gave a sigh as I crossed the 4th month. Phew! The 9th month's scan was truly amazing as we saw our baby lift up her hand and wave at us!! Our prayer to hold our baby safe inside the womb was so strong that the cutie pie didn't come out even after 40 weeks.
The long wait finally ended on the 7th July, 2010 as the Lord gave us a beautiful baby girl whom we named "Prathyasha" meaning "hope".
She's really an angel. She gave a new kind of hope for us. We learned to trust The Lord more & more. Everyday is a joy now. And as she crawls all over the place in her 8th month now, I refuse to fret & worry over the way she keeps me running after her. I hear a lot of moms talk endlessly about the way they are tired because of their active kid. But, how can I? I know what it is to lose a baby and to not have a baby. So I am thankful to God for my beautiful princess and for making her so active & smart! Her smile takes my breath away and the love she shows brings tears to my eyes. I thank the Lord every time I see her!
I want to thank every one here who took time to be concerned about me & also encourage me &through all my difficult times! Thank you!